Ointment Transcript 4/12/07

"The Ointment" Episode #277: "The Ointment Weekend Preview for 4/12/07"

It's Thursday, April 12, 2007 and you are watching "The Ointment." I'm Steve Tatham and I'm putting the show back in "show business." Hey, relax. You're still watching "The Ointment." Don't get scared. It's still me. This is "The Ointment," but we're doing things a little differently now on Thursdays. It's called "The Ointment Weekend Preview." Huh? What's that? Well, I'm gonna take a look at the world of show business. I'm gonna tell you what's comin' up this weekend -- hopefully, help you have some good times. You know, I know there are politicians out there making jackasses of themselves; but, they'll be there tomorrow and I'll be back to talk about them. But, for now, let's have a little fun.

TITLE: Movies
First up, let's take a look at the world of movies and see what's coming out this weekend. As you might imagine, I have very highbrow cinematic tastes so the film I'm most looking forward to this weekend is a movie called "Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film for Theaters." Now, if you're fans of "Adult Swim" then you already know what I'm talking about. And if you don't, you might remember this little terrorist threat. They put a marketing campaign out there with blinking lights featuring the characters in about a dozen cities across the country but the city of Boston freaked out. Called out the bomb squad. They thought it was a terrorist attack. Blinking lights -- this big. Every spring is terrorist season in Hollywood marketing. So now, let's take a look at a clip of "Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film for Theaters," which, as you may have guessed, has nothing to do with water, teens, hunger or, for that matter, colons.

(VIDEO CLIP from "Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film for Theaters")

I think you can now see why I am so looking forward to it. Because I hate to be sitting in a movie theater burdened with such things as character... or story. Because, after all, they just interfere with my Milk Dud consumption. Once again, that's "Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film for Theaters." Check it out this weekend.

TITLE: DVD
New on DVD this week is a movie called "The Good Shepherd" starring Matt Damon and Angelina Jolie. The film is directed by actor Robert DiNiro and it tells the story of the early days of the C.I.A. It tells that story in seemingly real time. Yes, this is a long movie. It's two hours and forty-eight minutes. Here's the DVD and it says right on the back "sixteen minutes of deleted scenes." As if you wanted even more. What I wanted to see was sixteen scenes deleted from the movie. This is actually the longest period of time in which Angelina Jolie goes without adopting a child. What I'm saying is, it's a long movie. In fact, you half-expect to see a firefighter come out with a bootload o' cash and give it to a sobbing Jerry Lewis. That's long. Why is it so long? Well, it's an espionage movie. It has a lot of twists and turns and character development. It's sort of a slow, seething movie. It's trying desperately to be the Protestant "Godfather." So now let's take a look.

(VIDEO CLIP from "The Good Shepherd.")

The movie might have been a little better if it had been directed by Coppola, but DiNiro does a fine yeoman's job. So, pencil in an afternoon and check out "The Good Shepherd." Also out on DVD this week is the classic movie "Bedazzled" -- the comedy with Dudley Moore. I'm not talking about the remake. I'm talking about the one from the sixties. If you can find it, it's worth a look as well.

TITLE: Music
In music this week, I want you to check out UK folk singer Kate Walsh, who has shot up to number one, believe it or not, on the iTunes music chart, after making her own homemade album in her friend's house.

(MUSIC PLAYS: Kate Walsh)

I always admire somebody who makes their own art in their own living room and then puts it online. I don't know why but I'm just drawn to that. Maybe if I were a hot chick with talent, things would turn out differently for me. Actually, she didn't make it in her own house. She made it at her friend, Tim's, house, so the album is called "Tim's House." Check it out.

TITLE: Web

And finally, for your weekend surfing pleasure, my website pick of the week is justin.tv about a guy who broadcasts video from his apartment and puts it out there on the web. Why am I drawn to such things? Let me tell you, Justin makes the rest of us look like amateurs -- people who put out three minutes of video a day or even an hour. Because Justin is broadcasting 24/7. He's broadcasting twenty four hours of video each and every day from a camera strapped to his head. He's gonna broadcast his entire life from today until the day her dies -- or, so is the claim. So now you can enjoy the tedium that is the life of a twenty four year old guy who lives in San Francisco and lives a completely unremarkable life. That's right. You can go to the bathroom with Justin. You can watch Justin on a miserable date. You can look forward to Justin having sex. What I look forward to is Justin at the doctor's office cause I want to see him get the release out of his physician. Or Justin on a job interview. That should be interesting. Well, good luck and enjoy your weekend.

That's "The Ointment" for another day. Thanks for tuning in. I'm Steve Tatham and that's your weekend preview. We'll catch you tomorrow, everybody.

(WATCH this episode)